Sunday Newscape Magazine

The secret of success in life is for a man to be ready for his opportunity when it comes. ~ Benjamin Disraeli

Thirty days after The Choice weekend retreat for women I schedule a follow-up teleconference. We reconnect, give updates on progress made toward goals set in the retreat, and go a bit deeper into a key spiritual principle.

It never fails that many of the women will feel a bit dissatisfied with their results in some goal or pursuit. And it's then that I remind them of one of the most essential teachings of the retreat: being comes before doing.

It's not hard to understand how this spiritual principle gets so little attention. The world we live in is all about doing. Upon meeting someone for the first time it's likely that the first question is, "So what do you do?" Doing seems to define who we are.

It's also not hard to understand why, with this focus in life, we often struggle to achieve what we most want. We even have clichés around the importance of doing, like: "No pain, no gain." Or, "If it was easy it wouldn't be valuable." We're conditioned to struggle because that's what seems required to attain reward.

But, like many truths of life that get passed down from generation to generation, I've found many of them are 180° backwards. To achieve worth in this life, you must first BE the person worth that achievement.

A good question to ask when yearning for what you most want is, "Who would I need to be to live the life I want?"

It's a well-known fact that the majority of lottery winners are bankrupt within 5-6 years of their windfall. Why? It's about money consciousness. Their net worth grew before their self-worth did. They were handling millions of dollars with a minimum-wage mindset. The IRS might have considered them millionaires, but they were by no means millionaires in their own minds.

What dreams or goals are you longing and planning for? It's good to have a clear vision of what you want, but then, I advise, turn your attention away from the vision of WHAT and focus on becoming the person that can spiritually own that goal.

My retreat ladies, like all of us, can forget this simple principle. Who you are becoming is much more important than what you are doing. If you grow into the person you wish to be, you'll find that doing becomes a natural extension of who you are and not some struggle to suffer through.

If you find yourself struggling endlessly to achieve your own dream - and maybe even questioning whether this dream is even possible - look within and ask, "Am I really ready for this?" Your ego might insist you are, but listen more deeply. If your consciousness and spiritual maturity is not on par with your goal, you'll find that if it does show up, like the instant millionaires, you may squander the opportunity by not knowing what to do with it.

In Joy Karen:

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